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xocrystalnicole / Love Lessons  / For Those Who Want Love That Feels Like 90s R&B

For Those Who Want Love That Feels Like 90s R&B

Listening to 90s R&B will have you believing that love like that still exists. It’ll have you believing that One Sweet Day, you’ll be Fortunate to have someone who says more than Let’s Chill. Someone who will plan a date, pick you up, and greet you with My, My, My, as you saunter out in that red dress and those high heels they like. They’ll make you forget about all the nights you begged so-and-so to Un-Break Your Heart, all those broken promises you made to yourself, saying, I’m Not Gon’ Cry, singing Another Sad Love Song because you said If I Ever Fall In Love again I wouldn’t be Weak, and you were, but That’s the Way Love Goes.

You were dreaming of Real Love, Happily Ever After, but instead, you got Creep and Nobody’s Supposed to be Here. Swore that was the End of the Road, but when they apologized and said I Will Always Love You coupled with a little Bump n’ Grind, you swore it didn’t mean anything and you wouldn’t take them back…until they said When Can I See You again and now you’re Back At One. At This Very Moment, you believe the Forever My Lady, Angel of Mine, All My Life spiel, but you know where this is headed. At Your Best You Are Love, but it seems you haven’t quite realized it between all the Come & Talk to Me that turns into I Wanna Sex You Up. And there’s no shade at all, we’ve all been there at some point in our lives.

But, what if I told you that love like the 90s still exists, you just have to create it. You have to be it, give it, and embrace it when it shows up in your life. As a culture, we’ve romanticized love. We’ve made it this unrealistic, unattainable thing of the past that is now extinct, which is so far from the truth. Love is all around us, but most of us want the easy, watered-down version of love. Those love songs and ballads are beautiful, mesmerizing, perfect, even, but for every love song there’s one of hurt and disappointment, and that’s real life.

Life is about duality. It’s about the good and the bad, the right and the wrong, the light and the dark. Thinking you’ll get one without the other is naïve and unhealthy. Love is as beautiful as you make it, but it’s more than amazing vocals over a soothing melody. It’s the minute, mundane things we forget about. It’s the growing pains, the disagreements, disappointments, and having someone push those buttons that only they know how to push. It’s push and pull sometimes, back and forth, ups and downs, ebbs and flows.

No one who has a successful relationship of any kind will tell you that it’s easy because it is not. It takes working at it every single day, and some days you’re going to want to give up. Some days you’ll understand why Snapped exists, but every single day, when you look at the person you’ve chosen to experience this beautiful energy with, you’ll understand why you had to go through all that you did, and it’ll be worth it, every single time.

Comments

  • Vanessa Morgan

    Yes to all that

  • Ola

    So beautifully and cleverly expressed. So glad I visited your site today.

  • Tiffany Haywood

    My Hubby and I are definitely fans of the 90s R&B kinda love. Our marriage just like those songs have ups and downs but knowing that at the end of either we will always be there for each other is what makes that love last.

  • Kiwi

    What a beautiful 90s ode to love. I love the new OWN TV show Love is which really give you all of the 90s love feels, but definitely I want to manifest this type of love vibes.

  • Mimi Green

    Shout out to the format of your words with song titles. So dope! Any relationship will take work but you can definitely make it what you want.

  • Kirstin N. Fuller

    Such a wonderfully creative way to start your article. I agree you get out of LOVE what you put into it. Love is not selfish and not a wealth of material things…it’s a wonderful feeling!

  • Kim

    90’s R&B was the ish! You’ve given me some ideas for songs for my friend’s wedding playlist, too.

  • robincharmagne

    So creative and the 90’s had some really good music that will stand the test of time!
    https://www.robincharmagne.com/blog

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