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xocrystalnicole / Love Lessons  / Don’t Forget About Your Strong Friend
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Don’t Forget About Your Strong Friend

If you’ve been blessed enough to have a strong group of friends, or a friend at all, cherish them.

As someone who gives, in my opinion, relatively sound advice, naturally, I’m the go-to person whenever anyone close to me is going through something. Bad breakup? I’m there. Career woes? I’m there. Family issues? I’m there. Whatever you need, I got you. I’ve become the strong friend, the one who often gets overlooked.

Being an empath, I carry the emotions and feelings of others. Whatever problems you have become my problems, and I’ll do whatever I can to make sure you’re okay. But, in carrying the weight of everyone else’s problems, not to mention carrying my own, it’s easy to get weighed down.

Being the strong friend is tiring. As much as we love you and want the best for you, we also need you to understand that we’re human too. We need you to see us. To see that though we may have solid advice at the ready, sometimes we don’t want to be a motivator. Sometimes we don’t want to be the strong one. We want—need—someone to reciprocate the same care we so often give. We need someone to encourage us and tell us everything will be okay. We need friends who will step in and pray for us when it seems we can’t pray for ourselves. We need someone who will hold us as we cry about our mess of a love life, then tell us to let that hurt go because they didn’t deserve us anyway.

We need you to be present.

Relationships are about reciprocity, and friendships are not exempt. At some point, friendships have to stop being based on superficial things and have to be more meaningful. Your circle of friends, no matter how big or small, should pour into you as much as you pour into them. You should be able to depend on them as much as they depend on you. It’s all a game of give and take, but if you find yourself giving more than you receive, it may be time to make some adjustments.

Take note of who you turn to when your life is in shambles. Examine how often they’re there for you, and measure it with how often you return the sentiment. It’s not always about money, advice, or physically being there, either. A text message or phone call just to see how they’re doing goes a long way.

You will never know the weight of the burdens your strong friend carries, but the least you can do is ask.

We can all use a reminder, so share this with your circle of friends, and remember to keep each other uplifted and encouraged. Also, be sure to check out some of the other friends you need in your circle.


  • Jennifer A. Herriot-Trejo

    Amen. Well said.

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