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How could it be? 20 something, all alone still. Not a phone in my name. Ain't got nothin', runnin' from love. Only know fear. That's me, Ms. 20 Something. Ain't got nothin', runnin' from love. Wish you were here, oh

— Sza

Ah, the twenties. As a twenty-five-year-old, Sza’s song “20 Something” is my anthem and will be for a while. This song, as with most songs on her album, CTRL, resonate with the deepest parts of my soul. I would say I’m not sure if it’s just me who feels completely lost in my twenties, but I know I’m not the only one feeling this midlife crisis before the midlife crisis.

The strides technology has made have been amazing and I could never take that away, although I do wish we could get a modernized flip phone so those hang-ups could go back to being everything. You could not tell me I hadn’t just cursed you out in twelve different languages when I slammed my phone shut, but I digress. As much as the advancements have been beneficial, they’ve also been detrimental, social media being the main culprit.

There was a time when things were kept private, when every moment wasn’t shared, and where you were able to enjoy someone’s company without being attached to your phone. I’m guilty of being a social media addict, but this addiction, which in itself is bad, has led to another, even more harmful behavior, which is comparison.

Comparing our bodies to those of Instagram models, comparing our lives to those who appear to be living the lifestyle of the rich and famous, relationship goals, etc., has caused us to feel stuck—to feel like we’re not doing enough. I can admit that I, too, have felt this. I’ve felt stuck, I’ve felt behind, I’ve felt like life was passing me by, and before I knew it, I would be sixty, wearing bloomers while rubbing my body down with BENGAY and Liniment with nothing to show for myself. But, I had to realize some things and I hope my realizations will help you understand the same things.

You are where you’re supposed to be.
You have all you’re supposed to have.
You’re doing enough.
You are enough.

As happy as the people we compare ourselves to may seem, we don’t know their struggles or their plights. Social media is only a representation of what people choose to show us, and let’s be honest, if we have the choice to pick what we show the world, why wouldn’t we show all the highs while simultaneously hiding the lows?

Beloved, you’re not behind. God makes no mistakes and where you are is where you’re supposed to be. When you become focused on your lane, your life, and your reality, nothing else matters. Your pace is not their pace, and their pace is not yours.

You have not been forgotten, you are not left behind, it simply isn’t your turn, yet.

Until that time comes, God bless those 20-somethings.

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